Lately I can’t help but ask myself what my “next big thing” will be in my personal and professional life. I feel really good about where I’m headed, but as my graduate program and assistantship in Aggieland both draw to a close, there is an ever-increasing impatience to “get started” on the next step. I certainly have learned a lot in my graduate program, equipped with the knowledge and skills that coursework and practical experiences provide, along with the challenges, rewards, and self-exploration that come with moving across the country to a school ten times bigger than what I was used to.
But this was all part of “the plan.” 5 years ago I set out to pursue a career in student affairs– changing my major, refocusing and recalibrating what I believed was personal success, and seeking out guidance from trusted professionals while I got involved all over campus. And while I’m already “there” in many respects, my “arrival” has fixated on a Masters degree and a full-time position for quite some time. Oddly enough, as hooding quickly approaches, I’m left with an odd disposition towards the event. I am certainly excited, overwhelmed, and thankful with respect to the accomplishment, recognizing the privilege associated with the opportunity, let alone the achievement of acquiring my Masters; but I’m uneasy. I’ve looked to this event and accomplishment as my next aspiration for such a long time that it’s hard to imagine not having such a focused purpose in my horizon.
I spend a lot of time thinking about my future– strategic and futuristic strengths mean that I’m always thinking about how my actions now will prepare me for the future, and what I need to work on to be better equipped once I “get there.” But having lost my most recent iteration of destination, I’m struggling.
It certainly gives me pause, thinking about how “present” I’ve really been over the recent (and not so recent) past– the dissonance certainly isn’t going unnoticed, so I don’t want to rush the process. But we need hope. I need to define the next dream.
In the meantime, here’s to reframing work once interested in titling the next chapter, to putting some thought and effort on the next page for a while.
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